Tuesday, October 2
10 Disastrous Appearance Stuff
Actually I really dont care about appearance too much but there are some features that take attention or we really hate to happen/have, some of them look ridiculous tho ...
1. Acne: I think it is the biggest problem of both guys' and girls' during body development. How happy the person who never had any acne on his/her face but probably it is a fucking lie :D "foundations" work very well I guess... It is not nice to be called during fight "hey, acne face! Dont mess with me as I will come over there and blast your acnes one by one" :D ... Or among kids they whisper each other so loud "wounded face is coming !!" that even the implied person hears it and wishes to be buried under the ground :D The most fucking part happens when you wake up with an acne exactly on your nose early in the morning while there was nothing on your face at night.. You think you are having a kind of nightmare as you are in between wringing the acne swell or not :D Because you find Cindirella is even luckier than you as she turns out to be poor girl after 00:00 and most of the time you think like that "ohh i look like a clown" :D maybe you got the metaphor...
2. Broken tooth: There is not such a big problem if you broke a back tooth but what if you break front one? hahahaha
You cant even laugh at this because as soon as you happen to open your mouth to laugh it will be shining like a bald man's head :DDD Nightmare will continue when you see a dentist if you broke it in a ridiculous way. Because there are some dentists who are not satisfied with an obscure answer.
Dentist: How did you break it? [dentist asks it while he is digging a grave in your mouth with a drill]
Patient: Wha Ila ay waz ohboa bwobla
Dentist: What??
Patient: [when the dentist is taking the fucking device out of his mouth] How do you expect me to talk while you are constracting a tunnel in my mouth?
Dentist: OK. Tell me now.
Patient: -_- .... [asshole]
HA Ha ha.. I think I would be a good sketch writer :D
3. Body hair: I can really understand that as being a human we can have genital and armpit hair but isnt it a bit weird one's having hair almost in his/her palms? Guys with only one eyebrow /````v'''"\ Girls with beard... Of course my sketch is coming afterwards.
Two men are talking to each other by adressing the other Punjabi man in sauna.
Man 1: Ohh look at that Sheikh, even he is wearing dark pullower in sauna.
Man 2: You idiot, It is his chest hair.
Man 1: Really? Hahahah then he will never feel frozen even if he was living naked in North pole.
Man 2: Probably polar bears wont attack him too by thinking he is an another neighbour bear from south.
4. Small boobs: This section is for female creatures. Of course I cannot mention guys but why the hell men just wish to be with some ultra super sized boob women even the rest of their body is not seen cuz of full moon x2 while men have nothing except two little dots? :D I also dont like the comparison such as
Girl 1: ahaha you are plain like a wooden.
Girl 2: look at yourself first. Do I call you a milky cow??
Girl 3: Both of you just shut up. I think we need to go find a surgeon as one of my silicone gives some air off...
[ Note it down: So girls please be grateful with whatever you have or have not :D because most of the men dont like fake boobs :D and you are not gonna be a pornstar or flying balloon right? So you dont need surgery ] All of the girls are beautiful - Just shake yourself and play a song by James Blunt: You are beautiful
Hehehe dont worry guys as I will not cut it fine over here by posting such a link:
If you wanna continue reading this please go to >>> www.idontgiveadamnsowhocaresfuckingassholes.com.uk
Heeyyy, REQUESTED: please dont click it really ^^ or click but I dont know what site you would end up with so it is not my problem.
5. Moustache: Not mustache but moustache as I am using British English mostly.. I really dont understand but some guys think that they look cool with moustache. Why? Maybe 70% of them grow up moustache so as to give girls the impression that they are mature and manly, 20% of them try to disguise their baby face as his friends probably laugh at them by making fun of "what a girly face" But do guys have to imitate Saddam Hussein or Ussame Bin Laden style?? Growing moustache like one day you will blow somewhere up. Who gave this idea to you? But why are girls who have moustache treated like aliens? Indian, Turkish, Greek, Italian, Egyptian, Chinese girls have facial hair indeed.
More than a month ago just had this conversation with my crazy Finnish frend.
Basic: lets prepare to do list
Cash: ok.
Basic: #1 wearing a moustache and end up with a club.
Cash: ok lol.
So break the sign KEEP OUT if you see 2 girls around with moustache then please dont call the police as we are harmless :D
6. Nails: Welcome to the real tragedy world :D First of all I should admit that I like gloomy bear as it is cute but I dont fancy gloomy bear nail polish which is really gross or it is cuz of my blood disgust. Anyway. As I remember that when I was around 13 or more there was a woman on breaking news that she grew her left hand nails for about 20 years :DDDD she was saving her hand inside a black long bag to prevent her nails to be broken. Hahaha, ewww it was really gross as her nails were swinging and touching the ground. She was scary with the black bag as well. Would her 20 years worth to grow nails? "Do something useful instead of dealing with such gross stuff !!!" I wish she could hear me from the TV at that time but maybe she is already dead and buried with her precious nails :DDD
Another story, there was an Iranian girl on formspring. She just sent me her nails' picture asking if I liked her nails as she had the simpsons nail polish on them. My bro Cashew (I call her like bro) just commented that her thumb nail polish looks like spongebob :DDD Iranian girl denied first but ahahaha apart from her 4 nails one really looks like spongebob.. (bro, i love the way you make me laugh out). We wont forget you Kimolooo.
And my sketch begins like;
Girl 1: [handshakes with another girl and breaks her nail accidentally] opps, I am really terribly sorry, I didnt ...
Girl 1: [by showing her nail and shouting] You little shit, how could you chop my mickey mouse's head??!!!
7. Big/long feet: People who have such big feet tend to hide their feet or shoes somewhere but mostly such commitments result in failure. We dont need to feel embarrassed indeed. As being a female I wear 40 (eu) myself because I am tall so my feet should keep the harmony to fit my height. If I had number 36 shoes for sure I wouldnt be able to stand up but fall each side and it wouldnt be so nice for me to kiss the floors ahahaha :D we can also imagine the opposite situation. Imagine a 1.60cm guy wearing 43 (eu). Wouldnt his feet look longer than his height? :)
Sorry guys I really dont intend to offend anyone. Just "be strong" till I am done then you can kill me after I publish this entry LOL. Maybe we should be enough confident and love our features whether others like it or not. Because we come life just for once but I dont say YOLO as it is such a stupid style I have ever heard of. Anyway. My another sketch:
Guy 1: [shy but trying to wear early before someone sees his shoes at the door and repeating farewell sentences again which makes him gain some time to find his shoes as soon as possible] Well, I will miss you and please call me whenever you need me.
Guy 2: Look at his shoes as they are like baby craddles ahahaha.
Guy 1: You are not funny dude. At least my big footstep will be a great work of art on your ass..
Ha Ha Ha. Personally it is better to keep your mouth shut instead of having such a memorable gift from a friend.
8. Dimple/beauty spot: Beauty spot is called beauty spot as its name so as to make a person prettier or more beautiful not ugly witch.. They appear everywhere even on unsual places as if they pick up where to appear by themself :DDDD and some people have dimples on their back :D when I was a kid there was a superstition if you count them then they increase in number :DDD my sketch about it: [ by the way I havent written nor noted down sketches before, just making up right now] ...
Wife: pffff I have been counting these beauty spots so as to have one of them on my face as I really want it. I want it, I want it.
Husband: Honey, I know where they appear whenever you count,if you really wanna see them then tonight lift down your pants and just look in the mirror as they all gather on your ass.
So Lameeeeeee :DDDDDDD
9. Stomach fat: If you have a cute stomach fat(e) then there is no problem but when you bolt food down and lie down motionless without doing exercise it is when the problem occurs. First few months you really dont recognize but after a while you notice at a time when you look in the mirror carefully that you sound like you have been eating lamb as whole during each meal :DDD
Guy 1: Are you pregnant as I cant see your belly button :D
Guy 2: You are too funny dude #$#@%¡
Dont do this with friends really as it might be very offensive..
10. Muscle: It is another disaster that both females and males are tricked.. Look I really dont care :D you can do whatever you want with your body as long as you keep a healthier life. It is okay to have six packs too but no need to exaggerate to take attention of the opposite gender by deforming your natural body shape maybe.. [ By the way I am talking about muscles not weight... :) ]
PS. Please dont take mockery, sarcasm,satire serious. Enjoy what you have read in this entry.. So dont mind, hope we become more tolerant and aware of the fact that appearance doesnt mean everything...
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