Wednesday, February 27

You Always Make My Life Upside Down

I swear I feel like that shit today

Noble Tears Counter

Maybe I don't feel alright right now.
Because of sudden sore throat..
I'm burning outside,freezing inside.
I think I am getting flu as well.
The matter is not the physical pain.
How about the mental/emotional one?
My mind is blowing so bad.
My feelings are so heavy to carry.
Irresistable pain waits for me to take.
But I know somehow I will handle.
People think nothing hurts me
and I am always fucking happy.
Yes I am because I need to be,
I try so hard to survive in this life.
But I always walk on the edge at all.
I am afraid to lose balance and fall.
Nobody understands, nobody can.
So please dont ever try hard on me.
Some friends but not the peace of mind
Everyday there is someone to hurt inside
I'm dying already with my own wounds
Am I that bad? Am I that wrong?
I wonder what is wrong with me.
One drop of tear brings the waterfall
Now I will tell you what I've done for you,
Fifty thousand tears I have cried.
And you werent there, you'll never be...

Everybody's Fool

You think I dont know
You think I dont understand
Yeah, you are right. I am such a fool
But not only me, everybody's fool

Different From Me

I'm not afraid of anything
I just need to know that i can breathe
I don't need much of anything
But suddenly, suddenly

I am small and the world is big
All around me is fast moving
Surrounded by so many things
But suddenly, suddenly

How does it feel, to be different from me?
Are we the same?
How does it feel, to be different from me?
Are we the same?
How does it feel?

I'm young, and I am free
But I get tired, and I get weak
I get lost, and I can't sleep

But suddenly, suddenly

"Would you comfort me
Would you cry with me? "

I am small and the world is big
But I'm not afraid of anything

Child In Time

LOL I remembered this video in the middle of the day and I wonder why indians are that funny with their music and dances.

It Is Just The Beginning, Not The End

You were like my childhood friend.. We were sitting on this wall between that 2 trees and swinging our legs .. This wall is high and seperates two apartment's entrance so we were around 12s and giggling.. So my mom called me to home as she used to.. I was very sad and sorry and told you "I have to go".. So you hugged me and said you have a surprise for me.. I jumped off the wall and looked up to wave you but you disappeared like a fairy.. So I entered to the apartment thoughtful then I pressed to the button of elevator while i was lifting up something fell on my head.. A paper, your hand writing on it.. You wrote "stupid" and one more paper fell.. "Pssstt I am here".. One more paper fell "you silly" written on it. I looked up to the root of elevator.. There were many many papers syou sticked and you wrote something on them.. I looked around.. Many papers too.. You drowned me in papers.. I took them back and gather in my hands but they were so many that i couldnt collect more in my hands.. I was reading at the same time because I was feeling as if you tell them with your voice :D and they were sparkling while i was reading so I stopped the elevator and decided to lift down because there were papers on the floor saying that I should check my mailbox as well. I get off and walked through the corridors... There were sticked papers on the floors that I kneeled down and tried to gather them too but you sticked them so hard that some of them were thorn apart but i was crazily happy to take them off from the floor one by one.. You made a long track with papers for me to follow... Like footsteps. They directly took me to my mailbox. I checked and many papers there too and letters... Many many letters.. I said "girl you are crazy.. " I thought it was endless... I was totally drowned in papers.. Big, small, shining, colorful, white ... So I had a big bag and put them inside.. Pressed the papers inside randomly to gather others.. Then I reached to the main entrance.. But i wasnt 12 anymore.. I didnt notice I was ageing while gathering the papers. I was living for ages but it felt like some minutes to me at all.. I got sad cuz I got old around my 50s in a sudden.. Not sudden but it was me who didnt recognize.. I looked out of the entrance and saw you shining and waving at me.. Like little childs do it to older people.. Yeah you were still like 12 even less than 12, maybe 9 .. I called you "Hello M. from distance and you asked how do i know ur name? I said I am your childhood friend.. You were surprised by saying how can an old lady be your friend. I said this is me.. But you said you dont know who I am.